Yesterday I went to watch the movie "I am number 4". I liked the part that they said: " Mogadorians fall in love only once, and forever". From one side it is very romantic only when both of your are from the same planet. But in real life, when the other half does not feel the same, then it can be quite painful....
From my point of view, I would say love only once and forever, whenever you think you found the one. But if it doesn't work out, don't give up your hopes in LOVE...
I'm someone who has had many relationships, both short and long. The long ones around 3 years but finally didn't work out. I kind of always had that mindset that "this is the one" and would last forever...but then it wasn't and I was the one ending them... You are probably thinking, then why you are the one talking about love only once and forever? Well, just to share with you what real life is...
Love is not only about passion, love is not only about finding someone that really loves you and take good care of you. My motto is that, there is always someone out there that is much better than us, much better than the one we are currently loving. Searching for the perfect match would never end if we don't learn how to keep and maintain a relationship, how to add that extra effort to make this relationship be the only one that would last forever....
I'm actually lucky to be a very adaptable person, so changing for me is not hard at all. I know, some would say "that person who is destine to love me should accept me the way I am". But then, that's how my first relationship ended. Both were too young to be willing to change, it was just passion...i love you, you love me, but why can't you xxxxx..... So making changes is necessary in a relationship, as long as it does not compromise you values, or as long as you don't feel uncomfortable. You change, because you try to make it work...
Having someone that takes good care of you, can be more than enough for some people. But it wasn't for me, thinking that you would spend the rest of your life with someone, I think of growing old together and spending each day together..(starting to sound scary for some people. And it could really be if you both don't have much in common or much to talk about). Of course future is uncertain, but there should at least be something at the present time that might bother you and then you think, would that bother me even more when we grow old? Then you try to work it out now, and if it doesn't, then...you know what's next.
It's been more than 6 years now that I've been with the one that I want to spend the rest of my life with (see? don't be afraid, always maintain that mind set, cuz doubting can be a barrier in a relationship). And we still have that passion, we still have that chemistry, we still miss each other so much. We still have that feeling that wish to be next to each other 24 hours of the day, and the most important thing is that, when I think about the future nothing really bothers me, I'm just eager to reach those 10,20,30,40,50 years or more that God would have mercy on us....
So my summary for today is:
- Fall in Love only once and forever in every relationship
- There is always someone better than us and than him/her (but if you really want to have a long lasting and happy relationship for once and for all, work this one perfect rather than hoping for the perfect one)
- Don't give up in LOVE...be hurt and learn
- After you learn, you will be more willing to change yourself in the next relationship (at least I hope you will)
P.S.: Please note that this is from personal experience, it doesn't mean whether it is right or wrong, neither it would mean that it would work for you the same way. I think the most important thing is to understand oneself. It is not hard to think that we understand love, but then to evolve it into a relationship, it takes understanding of other areas in life, such as life itself, family, and work
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